You now what this means?
(START RANT)
A whole lotta BS.
It means Trying To Conceive.
Oh, I bet you thought it was easy, right? Human bodies are made for it, after all. Seems to work all right, there are millions of people throughout history that get it right, right? No problem, say? Get off your BCP (Birth Control Pills, yet another of these pithy fricking abbreviations) and BOOM SMACK, there you are, all knocked up!
Well, missy, let me beg to differ.
It’s not like we have been trying for such a long time. We haven’t. But I had this idea that it would be so easy. The making is FUN, let me tell you. FUN. So then here’s the kicker – you have to wait for two weeks to see if it stuck or not. Every stinking month.
Or more.
That’s right, we’re late. Normally this would have me feeling very very happy – but up until this last Wednesday, I was already wading in nausea, smelling smells I have never smelled before…SO bloddy tired…but then. Nothing since. Couple pains on the day of, then nothing. No nausea. No tiredness. Nothing. Like a dead line.
Tried the urine test. Big No. Mind you, this is three days after it should be here.
No, you say? How can that be? Evidently, it can be in many different ways to can’t be! My wonderful, calm doctor said, if you don’t have it in another three days, come in. But what could it be?
- I don’t have any pain.
- I don’t have any other symptoms.
- I don’t have a period.
- I didn’t have any nasty girl things earlier that would make my tackle down there misbehave.
- I eat great – have lost about 23 pounds so far. Only vegan stuff, extra good for me.
- I exercise great – have taken the doctors advice and cut back, as extra athletic girls can’t get knocked up.
- Stress is incredibly reduced thanx to hubs’ organizational capabilities (seriously, the man is an organization god)
I obsess over this. Like nothing I have ever seen before, me especially. I was always so lassez-faire about things. Why is it now that I obsess over it? Or think, hmm, today my ovaries should be ovulating, or think of our love act as something other than just pure fun and love? I REALLY dislike that! I don’t want those thoughts in the back of my head!
I don’t want to watch a stupid calendar, or check my stupid mucus!
I don’t want to always wonder, oh, is this the month?
I don’t want to drive hubs crazy with my weird mood!
I don’t understand me right now. .The hubs is wonderful, giving me loads of good rational information, which normally never fails to calm me down. I am an immensely practical person. But in this case it doesn’t seem to help.
We’re late. And I can’t help but feel it’s my fault.
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Of course it’s not your fault. You are doing everything right. Just don’t get too stressed out. Go zen!
My daughter has been doing this for two years. EVERY month she’s sure, but no, no baby. She drives herself crazy EVERY MONTH.
I know it’s hard, but you have to stop worrying about it. Just relax. It will happen when it happens. YOUR baby isn’t ready yet. Maybe she’s finishing up things. Give her a chance to get to you.
She’ll get to you as soon as she can. It will happen. It will.
Of course it’s not your fault! Why not ask Lord Ganesha to intervene?
I have to second Debbi’s comment. When your child’s soul is ready to come to her body, then you will conceive. But rest assured that this will be on a tilmeline that you have little control over!